I Understand Why People Walk Away

Even as a kid, abondoned places intrigued me; my heart would beat a little faster and I'd feel tingly, when I'd come across a falling down house or cabin in the woods, excited about exploring it, and trying to figure out who lived there and what kind of life they had. Today I follow pages on IG that do the same thing. What I never understood was why people left behind so much stuff; some homes looking as if the occupants left just that morning, dishes on the table, pots on the stove, family photos gracing the walls. I get it now. When you walk into our kitchen, wine glasses with wine still in them are on the counter, waiting to be loaded into a half full dishwasher that now has a foot of mud in it. Onions and shallots are still in the bowl by the cutting board, knife, ready to chop them. I've spent the past 19 days searching through muck for salvagable things, trying to scrub them clean in the little stream behing the house. I tried saving some of my art supplies, but the drawers are filled with water, mud, and mold...everything is covered in so much mud, and mold. Victor broke the drawers out of my dresser and a kind neighbor washed my clothes,(three times), and was able to get them clean; our friend Joe bought me two pairs of trail shoes to replace the brand new pair that I lost. So much kindness from our friends. But I am overwhemed by the destruction, and the amount of work it will take to clean everything up. Becuase we had no flodd insurance, nothing is covered. I'm ready to walk away from all of it.